1315 Will This Matter in Five Years?
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How crazy, busy is your schedule? You are coming and going all the while transitioning to a new season. Will this matter in five years? Crazy, busy schedule. Silly, stupid...
show more- how we manage our hours in the day,
- how we communicate with family, friends, and co-workers,
- how we prioritize our week,
....and that's just the tip of the iceberg. School has started for most; and those who haven't are preparing for the ultimate return. The transition that can't be avoided! But what comes up too often are the struggles and battles fought daily, yet sometimes we as parents miss the signs. Last week we chatted about "Anxious for Nothing" (Episode 1308). And because the day is devouring our children, anxiety becomes a way of life. However, I wanted to continue the conversation. Children (and adults) have a very difficult time when it comes to change and transition. We all have different coping mechanisms to help us get through the uncomfortable times that suffocate our personalities. Think about how change affects you. Transition puts a hold on what feels good, what feels natural. It puts you in a position that isn't you! During these challenging times, what happens? You become...
- irritated
- short-tempered
- restless
- fussy
- self-serving
All of a sudden you're in a frenzy because of change! This change can force everyone into a state of strife. It's a battle! The sad thing is, we are missing the boat when it comes to recognizing this with our children, and ourselves. The K.I.S.S. ~ Keep it in perspective! "Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting, with strife." ~ Proverbs 17:1 Adding to the frustration and frenzy only complicates what you don't want to grow. So how can you regulate your response and reaction to change? First, you need to ask the simple question. Will this matter in five years? The key factor here is that we as parents tend to over exaggerate what isn't so bad. We push and ask the wrong questions that leaves the residue of "I'm not good enough.". For me, I caught myself asking innocent questions. But in actuality, it was reinforcing what I didn't want him to be anxious about. How do you begin to help your child and then help yourself?
- Get back into a routine.
- Let your child have a voice.
- Give your child a break.
- Encourage your child to share his/her feelings and concerns.
- Don't put words in your child's mouth. Don't place your concerns on your child.
The BEs of Change and Transition
- Be careful how you formulate your questions.
- Be conscious of the words you are using.
- Be present in their moment of vomiting.
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